because you don't see how much it's still hurting me.

i've lost.

we had problems mass conversing last night and you know why.
and hell yeah, 5th jan is coming! yayness!

When life gives you a 100 reasons to cry, show life that you have 1000 reasons to smile. Face your past without regret. Handle your present with confidence. Prepare for the future without fear. Keep the faith and drop the fear.

wen chong bo jio.

-

and i feel like shit now. oh well.

"leave it where it should be"
thanks joshua ((:

it has been a long 2008 and it's coming to an end soon. this year definitely wasn't smooth sailing nor was it exciting. memories of what happened in the earlier half of the year is slowly fading away.

the days production, stalion and axle joined the family, dotc 1 in feb, dotc 2 in march, camp evolution in april, otto pride, design or together chalet, mayday concert, car accident, staying over at tomu's, distancing myself away from everyone for a pretty long period of time, making wrong decision, losing some and gaining some, fallen in and out of love with the wrong person at the wrong time, interning at shooting gallery with warren, police case, final year project, hamsters, etc.

there are just too many regrets in my life, so many people i want to apologize to. nonetheless, thank you those who stood by me no matter what happens/happened. my life is contented just knowing that there's still people out there who i can turn to, thank you.

and all is wish and hope for is a smooth sailing 2009. world peace please.

got the hamsters from wen chong today & him been nicestone went to serangoon to get the hamsters' stuffs with me.

starbucks with sheena and ester was short and nice i guess. didn't really talk much because i was seriously stoning too. ester drove us to hougang and *CLAPS* she drives like a professional driver okay. like damn save, like i can just sleep in the car while she drives without my seat belt on and will still reach home safe and sound.

and so in the end met up with wen chong again and got another ninjacow home. awesome now i have 5 at home and warren only wants one. but nevermind, they are damn cute please.

i just gave them carrots and they are damn happy ((:


joshua is back in town! yay!

christmas was spent with sheena, walking in circles at vivo (and bumming into larry), dining at sushi tei, bumming around at pet's safari, spending the next half and hour at daiso and then starbucks at compass point.

not exactly a smacking christmas but it was enjoyable.

alright. gonna rest early today ((:

HAHAHA, joke.
i laughed at the first sentence, literally.
no plans for christmas but the day started off with a nice text message.
i'm more than glad and thank god for it.
i am waiting for sheena to be done at her aunt's and hopefully it won't be very late.

and i am very excited to get my FIRST hamster (although momsie kept nagging that having 2 terraphins and 1 don't-know-what-species tortise is enough for my room)! just hope that it won't turn out to be some physcotic hamster that wesley has o.O

i should REALLY start editing my FYP, but not today.

i hope for a better, happier and smooth sailing 2009.

wenchong edison says: (2:32:45 AM)
you know yesterday i ate this ham ah
wenchong edison says: (2:32:48 AM)
you know how big anot

FIONA / josephang. 強さ. 态度. you says: (2:32:52 AM)
how?
FIONA / josephang. 強さ. 态度. you says: (2:32:54 AM)
how big?

wenchong edison says: (2:33:06 AM)
its fucking big!

FIONA / josephang. 強さ. 态度. you says: (2:33:13 AM)
LOLOLOL.

wenchong edison says: (2:33:16 AM)
like, bigger than your head

-

wenchong edison says: (2:52:00 AM)
mac
wenchong edison says: (2:52:18 AM)
or you can order MacMee
wenchong edison says: (2:52:22 AM)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

it's raining now and it reminded me of how powerful the raindance yesterday was.

it was hot and sunny when we went out. so izak and sholehleh decided to do the raindance.
amos said 5small doses had little impact. so we did one loud one.
the next moment the sky turns dark and started drizzling.
still my favorite cheer.
AWESOME.

back from dotc1.

fayvo is awesome, fayvo is hot. it started off slowly but it ended off well.
so i am looking forward to dotc2 to meet everyone again!

first time working with chrystal, not that bad i would say.
but i need to improve more on my side. i seriously lost touch in camp )):
prepare prepare prepare.

alright, gonna go back to FYP mode for now.

thank you melvin for making me feel less ___(?)

&

i love you yumipong, please cheer up sweetie.
we shall enjoy the gentle seabreeze with some alcohol and muffins by the beach with no FYP on thursday okay?

&

DOTC1 22nd - 23rd dec.

i need a life badly. i want a getaway soon. my menses is killing me & i hope it will stop before camp because it's so troublesome going to camp with menses. granny is coming tonight means i have to surrender my room till she goes back to KL. tortor, titi and hero ran out of food a week ago i have to buy food for them before they all starts to starve. internet connection is so slow i can kill myself. i slept at 6+am this morning and woke up at 5+pm just now, i is awesome. i am still not into my editing, kill me? hello carmen, midnight chiong edit when?! i need some motivation. i am still not into christmas sprit which i hope they will come soon. i love jingles and carols really, so awesome la. i need to meditate myself into camp mood because nowadays all day long i think about is sleeping. & i miss you very much.

FINALLY I HAVE THE TIME TO WATCH 12LOTUS.

Sheena's birthday celebration was simple and nice. But I hope she did enjoy her day with us. And now, I am looking forward to CHRISTMAS. I need a break.

I FEEL DAMN FUCKED UP NOW. CHAOCHEEBYE.
AND THE WORSE PART IS I CAN ONLY BLAME MYSELF.

2 curve tracks with no dolly.
no adapter, no wire.
change into office wear, change into dress, change into office wear.
sam the waiter never wear specs after lunch.
"iya can la"
"lai lai chop chop faster"

thanks everyone. one more day. just one more.

call time is 10am later. jacky is picking me up at 9.30am later. now is 2.37am and i am still awake. what shit had i gotten myself into? i can't wait for shoot to wrap on sunday then i can concentrate on my post pro, clean up my room because apparently it's in a mess and help out the other shoots. money please come to me. i am affected by recession too )):

YAYNESS. WELCOME TO THE BIG2 CLUB!

somehow i am less stress this time round just hope that it will not rain during shoot tomorrow and on sunday if not i will die seriously. i puked in school just now and hakim knows who my husband is. next week is killer week. shoots shoots shoots and more shoots. plus dotc1 is coming and i totally forgot that it's next next week. i think i am going to die because i am not in camp mood now. i think i will sleep everyday during camp and let chrystal handle the empire (LOL). ahh kill me. and hakim totally scare the shit out of me with his krump seriously and i am seriously about learning locking. ain and carmen agreed to go muay thai with me after fyp. say yay to working out.

oh yes and i forgot to mention i ICE-ed today. very happy. it feels good to see your eyecandy okay.

jingle bells jingle bells jingle all the way.

HAPPY 19TH BIRTHDAY NICHOLAS CHIA PENG YANG.
I STILL LOVE YOU MANY MANY MANY NO MATTER HOW BALD YOU GONNA BE IN THE FUTURE!


Stupid FYP is depriving us of birthday celebrations. Let's have a major one during christmas yes yes? I insist on pizza on that very, very merry day! And like what Nicky said, we shall have a major chill out session after FYP ohman i miss those days.

Meh meh fionehneh is no like eff whay pee bleah.

态度

i really don't feel like doing anymore work for FYP. i lost the drive and everything else. and i feel that my future is so bleak. what am i going to do in the future? i really don't know. damn. fiona, this is not the time. but i am really very sad now )):

HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY JASONTANYUANYONG. Sorry I bailed on you again but I hope the celebration goes well. Hello, Steve Aoki playing on your birthday sure shiok la. Have a happy happy night and a safe trip tomorrow. Love you many many la.

ahhh. vodka mango is make you damn high. the rest is damn zai i is not because i cannot take it so they finished up the bottle omg. damn high damn high damn high. sheena is sleep. rajiv is going to fly to china and his very handsome friend is very handsome omg i is fa chun.

anyway i is realized, like jo and josh, i am slowly building a wall around myself to protect myself from people around me that i don't know. i don't know is it a good thing or not.

i is want puke again. damn seh. damn weak omg.

today is bump into old school mates day.
my legs are tired from walking up and down, up and down those tables.
my day was rewarded by this very hot guy in grey singlet.
it was a wasted trip to ikea with sheena to meet carmen.
in the end we had hotdog bun and sheena and i cabbed home.
awesome. broke still can cab. slap my face please.
ahh who cares. i am going to watch my v channel now.

leaving house to get dinner is not a bad choice afterall. bumped into my very handsome and favorite volleyballer, ho ming. weeee.

and i miss brother khoojisheng very much today because i dreamt of him last night )):

fyp suck because i am losing interest. but did i mention interim went well yesterday? heh. working tomorrow! acca invigilation. easy money come to mommy.

aww missing missing missing. come back quick!

because i am not a nice nor good person in nature.

how long ago was my last presentation. dang. interim one is here. meh.

I JUST FLEW TO THE MOON AND CAME BACK! WEEEEEEEE.

there are many decision in life that i regret.

They call me nehneh I like mushroom and I can't leave home without a watch.
To-Do/Wish List:

1. $2 scheduler from Muji